Lessons Learned – Relationships over Things
By: Craig Peterson
Craig Peterson’s ChildrenI had the best of intentions. I never would have imagined my misstep – the precedent I was setting. After all, I was simply trying to be kind to my two newest sons.
They came to me after a decade of extreme neglect and severe abuse at the hands of their birthmother’s boyfriend. Both endured more than 20 out-of-home placements after being stuck in the revolving door of family reunification.
Lessons Learned – Entitled and Detached
By: Craig Peterson
Boys with GiftsSince my two sons hadn’t been diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder when they were adopted at nine and ten, I didn’t know to look for control.
What I did see was their sense of entitlement.
That Mom Could Be Me
November 6, 2014 by: Gari Lister Tuesday morning I checked Facebook and saw a post that made me start to cry before I even finished reading it. A “critical” missing person in my neighborhood — a teenage girl. The police notice originally mentioned a history of childhood abuse, and noted that a suicide note had […]
WARNING: DO NOT RIDE THE ROLLER COASTER
By: Deborah Novo
It has been fifteen years that I have been “in the trenches” with two sons with Reactive Attachment Disorder. I have had so many moments feeling inspired and motivated to be an awesome therapeutic parent only to be plunged into the mindset of ” I can’t take it anymore.”
Lessons Learned — Less Chores, More Backgammon
by: Craig Peterson
My oldest son hated chores. Even the mention of the word set him off!
IMG_1235[1]No wonder. Before being adopted, he was regularly told to not only watch his five younger siblings but also clean the family apartment.
Although he tried – and he did try — his step-father was never pleased with his effort and used the opportunity to beat him before taking his anger out on my son’s mother.
Wearing a Mask
October 30, 2014 by: Kelly Killian As Halloween approaches and children begin to pick out costumes, they pick out a new “personality” to try on for a day. It makes me think of our kids. So often what you see is a mask that they are wearing for the occasion. It is not the true […]
Tuesday Toolbox: Bedtime and Sleep Issues: Part I
By: Jennie Murdock
I believe in serendipity…..”an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident”. As I was preparing to write this, my first post on sleep issues, I opened a recent “MindHealth” report by Dr. Gary Small. In it he was addressing the issue of “masked depression” and all of its tell-tale signs. The report reminded me that for sure, most of the children we parent and treat in therapy with serious attachment issues have that masked depression which most assuredly affects their sleep.
Lessons Learned – Understand Attachment Even Before the Placement Begins
By: Craig Peterson
Two Little BoysAlex and Travis are biological siblings. In 2001, they needed a home. One was nine and the other ten.
I wanted to help. I felt called.
Since I had done well with my first four children – all diagnosed with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, I thought these two would be easier to parent. Both were high functioning and personable.
Thanksgiving
By: Jane Samuel
‘Tis the season – for thanks giving that is. I see friends posting things they are thankful for each day on Facebook. There are probably similar lists on Twitter, Tumbler and Google+. I suspect my teens are being flooded with them on Instagram and my own email and snail mail is filling up with Thanksgiving letters from various non-profits, all worthy of a little monetary love AND thanks for their work making this a better world.
Because It Is Hard
By: Gari Lister
“We choose to go to the moon . . . not because it is easy, but because it is hard . . . because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win.. . . ” John F. Kennedy, Jr. (Sept. 12, 1962 at Rice University)