Tuesday Toolbox – I Love You Rituals
by: Gari Lister I think one of the most challenging elements to having multiple children who suffered early trauma is the dance of building both a cohesive family and one-on-one connections with each child. My younger girls no longer have severe attachment issues, but I have found that taking steps to enhance our connection goes […]
The Search for a School That Fits
by: Melissa Sadin
Teenager with problemsAs the parent of a child with moderate to severe attachment trauma, I have struggled for years to provide my son with an appropriate educational program. I have worked as a special education teacher and an administrator, so I know the lingo needed to get what I want at an IEP meeting. However, I was startled to discover recently that I wasn’t sure I knew what my son needed. My son always makes it very clear to all involved when something doesn’t work for him. The things that do work, however, are much more subtle and harder to see. My son has never said, “Oh, I like Mrs. Soandso. I feel safe in her class and am able to process language better there so I perform better academically.” The closest we get to that is, “She’s okay, I guess.”
Does it Work for Me?
by: Gari Lister Parenting an adult child with reactive attachment disorder — especially a young adult — can be challenging, to say the least. My oldest is 23, and we have been through a LOT with her since she became a “legal” adult. We have faced questions like: do we press charges, do we give […]
Tuesday Toolbox — Mama’s Room and Mama’s Bed
by: Gari Lister Yesterday’s Good Morning America featured a story on co-sleeping based on controversy a blogger sparked when she admitted to sharing a bed with her six year old son. The piece opened with a clip of a little girl whining that she was scared and wanted to sleep with mommy — and the […]
ADHD versus Anxiety
by: Craig Peterson A recent article about the misdiagnosing ADHD in children with early trauma has been making the rounds. Before everyone jumps on the bandwagon, let’s remember that many mental health issues are at play. Not all children are the same. Each needs to be carefully diagnosed. For traumatized children who haven’t begun to […]
Therapeutic Parents — Check out These Trainings Coming Your Way
As we begin 2015, many of us may have resolved to learn more about early childhood/attachment trauma and attachment disorders. We may need to delve into how to be therapeutic parents or need a refresher in strategies to stay calm and provide a healing environment. The following events are not organized by the Attachment & […]
It’s Not Your Fault
by: Gari Lister I spoke with a mom yesterday for close to an hour. She wasn’t asking for help for her children — instead, she was desperate for help for herself. Why? Because she was frustrated that she hadn’t been able to accept that her children weren’t loving to her. She blamed herself — the […]
Tuesday Toolbox: Using Family Traditions to Bond over the Holidays
December 9, 2014 by: Gari Lister For many traumatized children, the holidays are stressful — changes in schedule and expectations, less physical activity and, of course, lots of close family time. Plus we parents inadvertently make things worse — as we stress about how to wrap all the presents, cook all the food and make […]
Facebook and Birth Family!
December 8, 2014 by: Deborah A. Novo I picked up the phone to hear my, then 18 year old son, say, “Mom, you will NEVER believe who I just found on facebook!” I found myself holding my breath as I instinctively knew to whom he was referring. The woman who gave birth to him and […]
What ATN Means to Me
December 2, 2014 by: Julie Beem A long time ago in what feels like a galaxy far away, I was a sleep-deprived mom of a raging toddler whose behaviors made absolutely no sense. I was an experienced “good enough” mom — so what was I doing wrong? My introduction to ATN came via a group […]